20th Anniversary

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We celebrated our 20th Wedding Anniversary with a luncheon dinner party July 27, 2000 at the Westover Inn here in St Marys. We were married August 2, 1980 in London at the University of Western Ontario where Kate and I were in graduate school. These days I'm working at the University of Waterloo while Kate continues with CAMH (and it's evolution from ARF).

This party was sponsored by Kate's parents — Jack and Doreta. Kate says Doreta was always a bit disappointed that our wedding dinner wasn't more "formal". On our wedding day we had a buffet dinner catered by Food Services and served in Sommerville House at Western where we were married. This today was quite different — an elegant service with gourmet food, white table cloths, stemware, fine china and more. We had planned on having about 50 guests but it turned out there was about 60 of us who came and we had to take over two separate dining rooms at the inn.

We had all of our bridal party in attendance except for Monica (Gord's first wife was an attendant for the bride and we've lost track of her). Alison Preston was the maid of honor with Joan Watson as the other attendant. Mike Schwan was my best man with Gord (Kate's brother) and Ken Edmonstone (my nephew) as groom's men.

I don't recall any speeches that day but I do recall that both my dad Maurice and Kate's dad Jack took an opportunity to say a few words. Jack told a long and winding shaggy dog story, we wondered where in the heck he was going, which ended in a punch line about a "cat scan and lab report".

The day had started with cocktails and a visit outdoors on the patio deck at the inn, followed by the luncheon indoors, and ended with more drinks and tom foolery at our home and on our deck. The day started sunny but by the late afternoon a gentle rain had started that made for some summer tobogganing on the slope in our back yard. Leo, Paul (my younger brother) and I would take turns pulling a plastic sheet with a rider on it down the hill. We had done this before when the kids were visiting so it wasn't that weird. There's a picture in the album of Leo and me pulling Cindy on a ride down the hill. I worried that we might trip on the way down but, although we were winded, there were no casualties that day. Sam's husband Al took it as an opportunity to do a sliding dive into some wet grass — still crazy after all these years.

One of the interesting and traditional things we did for our party was to serve some of our original wedding cake. We had been keeping it wrapped up in our freezer all these many years. The other was to give everyone a C90 cassette mixtape of "Hits at our House" — that tape is now in my iTunes library as well as available on my YouTube channel. There are many tunes there that still mean a lot to us. Here's that playlist with the original commentary:

1. Marilyn & Joe (Kinky Friedman). Our trailer park love song.
2. Weekend Punks (63 Monroe). We were weekend punks ... for a while.
3. Passing Through (Leonard Cohen). I'll always remember that bus ride!!
4. London Calling (The Clash). A favorite punk band.
5. Night Rider's Lament (Jerry Jeff Walker). Life's about choices — marrying you was one of the good ones.
6. General Strike (DOA). Our favorite suburban punkers (we like their politics as well as their music).
7. One More Spring (Garrison Keillor). A good excuse to go to Mpls (we did too — to see the PHC show).
8. Sonny (Jean Redpath). Another song we both love and another definition of Canada
9. Reason for It All (Eric Bogle). We saw Eric at the Horseshow Tavern and will again on our anniversary.
10. Rodeo Wind (Chris Wall). Cowboy music should be defined by songs like this.
11. The Crawl (Spirit of the West). Been there, done that.
12. Passionate Kisses (Lucinda Williams). Pat introduced this to us by making Reg wear headphones to listen intently.
13. Fairytale of New York City (The Pogues). It's just so much fun to sing "you scumbag, you maggot!"
14. Memories of East Texas (Michelle Shocked). I think of Kate as a girl who has seen the ocean.
15. Gulf Coast Highway (Nanci Griffith). Just a great love/life song (and another artist Pat introduced us to).
16. Road to Bayamon (Tom Russell). Life is a circus on the Road to Bayamon (Reg wanted "Homestead Steel").
17. Crossing the Causeway (Grievous Angels). Our dessert island band — about 10 years running.
18. 45 Years from Now (Stan Rogers). Make the most of the moment.
19. Corpus Christi Bay (Robert Earl Keen). We've had great times in altered states and the state of Texas.
20. Pico de Gallo (Emily Kaitz). We were in the audience when they recorded this one!
21. What I Like About Texas (Gary P. Nunn). People wonder why anyone would like Texas — here's a few reasons.
22. Dublin Blues (Guy Clark). We've seen the Spanish Steps and the David (and I loved you from the get-go).
23. Rivers of Babylon (Steve Earle). Psalm 137 — religion makes for some good music.
24. In Spite of Ourselves (John Prine/Iris Dement). She's my baby, I'm her honey.

These photos, probably none that I took, some that Kate took and many by friends and family who shared with us, were in a small photo album which, at Kate's urging, I scanned during the summer of 2023 (some 23 years after the fact). When I look at these photos there are many fond memories of the event, the people and that time. Some of friends we still hang around with, some of friends and family who have passed away, and some of friends who have simply drifted away.

In My Life —

There are places I remember

All my life though some have changed

Some forever, not for better

Some have gone and some remain

All these places have their moments

With lovers and friends I still can recall

Some are dead and some are living

In my life I've loved them all

But of all these friends and lovers

There is no one compares with you

And these memories lose their meaning

When I think of love as something new

Though I know I'll never lose affection

For people and things that went before

I know I'll often stop and think about them

In my life I love you more

Though I remember I’ll never lose affection

For people and things that went before

I know I’ll often stop and think about them

In my life I’ll love you more

— Lennon & McCartney 

This note, these photos and the YouTube playlist were created during the summer of 2023.